Cheat on Your Cheats

Why do people cheat? Whether it’s on their diets, on exams, on partners… it’s likely because they’re not getting what they want or need (yumminess, good grades, emotional support). So if you’re eating clean but the sugar beast has you in its grasp and you just… can’t… resist… consider this:

Eating treats does some wackadoo chemical things to your brain. It feels good. Serotonin happiness, brief energy boost, etc. You know this, you know your craving is probably based in something other than hunger. Are you bored, and munching is something to pass the time? Are you tired and feel like you need a little pick-me-up? Get this: you can cheat your cheat. You can get EXACTLY the same chemical payoff by way of an endorphin rush by moving your body.

I know, I know, it sounds less fun and more effort-ful to move around than to chow down the chocolate… but try this for a week. Whenever you find yourself reaching for comfort by way of snacks -

(Side note: I’m not talking about when you’re hungry. When you’re hungry, eat real food.)

- whenever you’re heading down the mindless munching path, set a timer for 10 minutes and DO SOMETHING ELSE. Burpees, pushups, squats, high knees running, jumping jacks, any combination of any series of movements you can think of as long as it makes you huff and puff. Work up a little sweat. Then if you still want the comfort-y food, eat it. I bet it’ll be easier to walk away once you’ve fulfilled your own need for endorphins.

Bonus: you get to walk around feeling all high-and-mighty when you’ve defeated the cheat-monster. You get to be “that guy”, telling your friends how you avoided the cookie by doing pushups. You get to watch your friends slowly back away. Then two weeks later when they ask why you’re looking so freaking awesome, you get to say “remember, the pushups and the cookie and and and?” and then you get to say “I TOLD YOU SO!” which is sweeter than any damn cookie.

Monkey Doo

I blame the brownie man. After nine gloriously on-track days, I slipped and fell face-first into a tray of refined carbohydrates. I was the author of my own demise in a way… remember how I said I wouldn’t be going hungry? Well, I got busy, then peckish, then downright huuungry but didn’t do anything about it (see first excuse, “busy”). Getting hungry leads to Binge City (it’s like Sin City, but binge-ier) (also, fewer hookers). So yeah. It’s been a care-free, kick-up-your-heels kind of 48 hours, but as of 4pm today I’m back on the wagon.

Fall down seven times, get up eight, right?

Welcome to Meat Week, kiddos.

Exhibitionism Update

Here we are, noon on Day Four of Project Svelte (only one of its many names) and here’s what’s happened so far:

First thing in the morning, fasted metcon. The first two days were just rowing intervals so I could re-find my rowing technique (day 1 was 4x 500m, day 2 was 3k for time, day 4 was 250m, 25 burpees, times 4. Where’s day 3, you ask? Hush.). I’m surprised and delighted to find that I can row at a 1:57/500m pace at a 25 strokes/minute rate. I used to have to fling myself around at 32-40 strokes/min. There’s a FGB video out there somewhere where it looks like I’m trying to row the damn thing across the room. For any cardio junkies in the audience, please note that the morning metcons never last more than 20 minutes, but are an 8-9 out of 10 for intensity.

Don’t row in socks. You’ll get blisters from the foot rests.

Food: breakfast is eggs and back bacon, lunches have been chicken & greens either in salad or soup form, and dinners have been steak and broccoli. There’s some coconut milk in coffee from time to time, and I stole a prune from Etta yesterday… Silly move. To battle the resultant sugar cravings (and to avoid eating the BROWNIES that a certain husband made. BROWNIES. I say again BROWNIES) I had a bit of almond butter last night. I’ve only had one incidence of “brain fog” which was quickly dealt with by eating a whole whack of cucumber. Turns out my caffeine tolerance drops when I’m eating clean, too! I suspect coffee sends my insulin for a ride, but I’m not willing to give that up just yet.

Tally to date: no wine, no chocolate, no grains, no sugar, no potatoes, no beans. Feeling good.

Anybody out there working a similar plan?

Armpits and Sugar

I saw this in the comments over at PaNu:

I have noticed substantially less absolute need for personal hygeine with paleo or at least VLC eating. I have stopped using deodorant completely. My shirts could easily be worn several days in a row before washing. On VLC the glucose in your sweat, sebum, etc must be much lower. Less sugar – less bacteria.

And at the risk of oversharing… I have to agree! I used to think stinky sweat was due to the amount of coffee in my life, but found when eating super clean (meat, fat, green veggies, nuts and seeds, in that order; no sugar, grains, or dairy) I could drown myself in caffeine and not get smelly. Jittery, yes. Smelly, no. (I’ll talk about the caffeine-insulin-cortisol trifecta in a later post.) Curse you, sugar! You make my armpits reek!

Yet another reason to avoid the stuff.